My husband passed away now i see orbs in videos
My mother is one of the kindest people that ever walked this earth, and there is nothing she wouldn’t do for me. We are very close and we only really have each other. I told God, if you give me the strength, I will not quit and I will get this done. The other 2 missed days was because I had to move her. When they took her to the ER, I did not think they would let me go because of the covid restrictions. Every other day I was with her from 10am-8pm (visiting hours). First one was the night she went to the emergency room in the first place, and 2 days when I had to move her from the second floor apartment to the first. ) She was in the hospital for weeks because of that fall, followed by rehab for 3 more weeks. So that right there took away her chance to do a lot of things before she goes Home. And this was the time we found out she even has cancer, when an MRI was done after the fall. Did I mention she broke her hip? She did, in the hospital as a matter of fact, when she was in the emergency room being treated for a nasty eye infection. She does not want to go through treatments. She is 75 years old, we have a history of cancer and unsuccessful treatments in our family, especially where the women are concerned. She would not allow biopsies on the other findings, and is choosing to not have treatment. Lung cancer, and it is possible that it has metastasized in other parts of her body. Relate? Thought? Leave a comment! As always, subscribe to get our new posts and other grief resources right to your email! April 3, 2020 It is my sadness, the bittersweet joy of knowing that I once had the perfect mom for me, it is my longing that lets me feel her. I feel her in the way I can’t feel her at all.
![my husband passed away now i see orbs in videos my husband passed away now i see orbs in videos](https://media.wired.com/photos/593265e5a312645844994818/master/pass/black-orb-ft.jpg)
I miss her in a way that I didn’t know was possible. I’m not the only one, it turns out, who hasn’t been able to “feel” their loved one. While I love my grief tattoos and the story they tell, a story of a daughter who desperately wants to be as close to her mother as possible, I still don’t feel my mom.Īs the years have passed by, I feel less shame about this. I got a third tattoo quickly followed by a fourth one - a large tattoo with two yellow flowers and a white moth. Was our relationship not as close as I had thought? Was she ok? Was she trying to reach out to me and I couldn’t hear her? I kept it to myself and just doubled-down on my efforts. I certainly couldn’t admit to people that my mom had not “reached out” to me. I played her favorite songs.īut I just couldn’t feel her. I ran my fingers over the outline of my grief tattoos. I addressed the thoughts in my head to my mom. Maybe if I had these pieces of her with me all the time, I’d feel her.
![my husband passed away now i see orbs in videos my husband passed away now i see orbs in videos](https://cdn.images.express.co.uk/img/dynamic/80/590x/Orbs-Canada-734352.jpg)
I started wearing her wedding ring on a chain around my neck. Maybe if I prayed for her, if I meditated on it, I’d feel her. I went to different spiritual places, all different denominations. Told me that she was always with me in my thoughts and I needed to stop looking so hard for signs. Told me to look for yellow flowers and white moths. And so many of those people told me not to worry because I would always feel her with me. Maybe our spiritual connection was just experiencing a delay?Īnd then, who knows what happened those next few days.
![my husband passed away now i see orbs in videos my husband passed away now i see orbs in videos](https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/71TQPrwEsSL.jpg)
I hadn’t even woken up when the phone rang. I learned about it through a voicemail from my dad. I had spent every night in the hospice center with her for a week straight, and of course, the one night I went home to sleep in my bed instead of her chair, she died. I didn’t feel any pang of telepathic pain when she finally let go. So imagine my surprise when my mom’s body finally took its last breath and she did not immediately become one with the Force all around me. Obviously, we would keep in touch just like everyone said we would. She was cheerful, hysterical, compassionate, easy-going, generous, and spiritual. We talked every day and we saw each other several times every week, scheduled and spontaneous time together.
![my husband passed away now i see orbs in videos my husband passed away now i see orbs in videos](https://cdn.cnn.com/cnnnext/dam/assets/110919092442-ghost-main-image-story-tablet.jpg)
See, because if there was any mother-daughter combo who would certainly keep in touch once the veil had come between us, it would be my mom and me. That as she was dying in hospice, it would all be ok because I would always feel her presence I would obviously receive messages from her. I needed to believe that this would be true. These are the very kind and infuriating things people have said to me over and over again since my mom died in 2012. Sharing with all of you, because we have a feeling many of you will relate. Written and shared with us by our grief-friend, Cara Jeanne.